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However, this does not always last once the song is over and you leave the dance floor. More than once I have found that I can dance with someone really well, but then when we try to sit and down and have a conversation, I realize that we have nothing in common besides a fondness for dance and that we clash in every other aspect. When this happens, it is important to think about and decide what kind of relationship you would like to have with that person based on how compatible you two are off of the dance floor. Sometimes people who dance together and find themselves incredibly attracted to each other physically, but realize or sometimes not that they don't have enough or anything in common between them to be able to have a serious romantic relationship, so they decided to have a short-term fling that is just physical in order to relieve the sexual tension between them.

Once that's done they go their separate ways and move on with their lives. In my experience, based on what I've seen happen to other couples that do this, they tend to grow apart afterwards and not really spend much time together at dance because the "mystery" or "fantasy" that came with the dancing is gone between them. If this is something that you don't think that you can handle emotionally, then I recommend toning down your existing relationship with that person to a lukewarm platonic friendship until things "cool down" between you two.


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In general, if you are a good dancer, you probably have an established routine and set of places that you like to go out dancing to. This might include lessons or classes with a particular teacher or studio. It might be dance clubs that you go to every week, or special events that you go to every month or year. Regardless of the venue, you probably see a lot of the same people where you go to dance. This is why dating someone from dance can be compared to dating someone from work, because you see them on a regular or at least semi-regular basis, so it can get really weird, really fast if things don't work out well between you two.

It's also why you should try to keep your relationship a secret until you've decided that things are going well enough for you to become an "official couple. In general, it's best to err on the side of caution when it comes to dating someone you have met at dance due to the visibility of the relationship, as well as dealing with the potential aftermath that I've described above.

If you both of you dance regularly, it's a good idea to take things slow and really get to know each other as dance partners and friends first before moving on to the next steps. Before you start dating someone from dance, it is very important to consider the aftermath of the breakup in case things don't work out between you two. If both of you are skilled dancers that have been dancing for a long time, it's more complicated because if you have a bad break up there is the issue of who gets to "keep" different dance venues.

Breaking up with someone from dance, just like in any romantic relationship, leaves you having to "divide up" the goods, such as places to go out and friends to talk to and hang out with. For this reason, it's best to keep your dating somewhat discreet until you want to officially be a couple in the eyes of the dance community.


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This way, if it doesn't work out, everyone else will be none the wiser and your friends won't be obligated to choose sides. However, if you are both newbies, it's a different story. Usually whoever is the "weaker" or less serious dancer will drop out from the dance scene, either temporarily or altogether. Another issue to consider is that bad breakups tend to make at least one of you stop dancing for a while which can be very difficult if dancing is a big part of your life. It might also turn you off from dancing altogether if you had a very serious relationship with your dance partner.

Fortunately, I have some tried-and-true advice on how to develop and maintain a healthy relationship so that if and when you do break up, it will be much more amicable and allow you to continue dancing with as minimal heartbreak and discomfort as possible given the situation.

Love to Dance?

If you like someone from dance, but aren't sure how they feel about you, try flirting with them a bit and "turning up the heat" a little so to speak and see how they react. If they respond well and flirt back with you, that's a good sign to continue on the path towards trying to be more than friends. If they get uncomfortable or don't react how you expected them to, then it's better to leave them a lone and stay just friends.

Once you get a read of how the other person might feel about you, continue flirting with them for a while until you feel that you've "warmed up" your friendship. It is important though to find out if they are seeing someone else though. A number of times it's happened that someone is already in a relationship with someone else, but that someone else is busy working or doesn't dance which is why you don't see them together.

You don't want to be the other woman or man! If you're feeling a bit more bold, you can invite them to a party or out to dinner, or some other non-dancing activity. It is critical that you trust your romantic dance partner because if you don't, then you won't have much of a relationship together. It is important that you both understand that dancing is just dancing, nothing more. Holding a bachelor's degree in psychology, I can safely say that whatever baggage you have from your past relationships you will end up carrying into new ones, so whatever issues you have will come up again and again until you work them out and resolve them.

Even just one session of couple's therapy has been shown to be very helpful and informative! Dating someone that you dance with is not much different from other relationships when it comes to public displays of affection PDA.

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No one besides you and your romantic partner are interested in seeing that! If you feel that you two can't keep your hands off each other for more than 2 seconds, well then stay at home and have your way with each other then. I know one time I was out dancing and there was some guy with his special lady who decided to start kissing her passionately and holding her closely while they were sitting together at a table by the dance floor and it was incredibly distracting since they were sitting literally about 3 feet away from where I was!

Appropriate ways to display affection while out dancing as generally agreed upon by myself and the larger dance community include: Even if you generally don't consider yourself the jealous type in relationships and think it's only for stupid or insecure people, you will be surprised to see how much power it get a hold of you when you see your partner dancing with someone else for the first time. You might also find out that your nice, sweet boyfriend is actually kind of a control freak that doesn't want you to dance with anyone else but him. You might also find yourself being tempted by someone else more appealing that you meet on the floor.

Many times partners get jealous of one another when they see them dancing with someone else. This is a natural reaction that we carry over from our other romantic relationships, so don't be alarmed if it happens to you. Just remind yourself that your romantic partner is ONLY dancing with that person and that when the music is over, they'll be coming back to you at the end of the night.

Also, if you don't have a good tolerance for dealing with stressful situations in relationships, then you may want to reconsider dating someone you dance with because trust me, dancing puts a LOT of stress on relationships! With dancing you engage with other people in a way that you normally would not otherwise on a regular day-to-day basis. This is especially true for more romantic and intimate dances like bachata, rumba, and tango.

You can also include merengue in this group, but if anything it's more of sexy fun dance that could go either way. Generally most dancing couples that I know, have found it to be effective is to draw boundaries for which dances they can dance with other people, and which ones they only dance with each other.

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Salsa, cha-cha, cumbia, foxtrot, waltz, swing, and other dances that don't require full body contact can be danced apart with other people, outside of the couple. Bachata, Rumba, Tango, and other romantic dances are best reserved for the couple to dance exclusively with each other. The reason why is that romantic dances sometimes tend to blur the line between fantasy and reality, especially when one member of the couple thinks that the other is enjoying the dance "just a little too much" and gets jealous because they believe that there is something more going on than there actually is.

A good way to deal with and avoid jealousy, along with keeping your relationship healthy, is to create some space between yourselves by having "his and her" dance nights. What I mean by this is that each of you choose a place and day when you would like to go dancing separately on your own without your partner attending. Dancing on separate nights lets you hang out and spend time with your friends without feeling guilty about neglecting your date, as well as giving you a chance to relax and catch up about things that your romantic partner might not necessarily be interested in.

Furthermore, it gives you the opportunity to practice dancing with other people, which in turn improves your dancing by providing you with the experience of a variety of dance styles. Going to dance without your partner allows you to maintain a social life that is yours alone and independent from your romantic relationship, allowing you to have a personal identity of your own. This is helpful is making sure that each of you stay involved with the dance community and don't become socially isolated, thus addressing the unhealthy habit that many dating couples fall into of spending too much time together.

Furthermore, it helps you in the long run by making the transition back to being a single dancer easier in case things don't work out between you two. Trust me when I say that it's easier to go back to dancing with other people whom you aren't dating, when you've been dancing with those people a regular basis and didn't abandon them for 6 months or however long it was you two were dating. Sometimes they're mutual, and other times not so much. It's hard to say if a relationship will last or not, but it always hurts when it doesn't.

Hopefully it's an amicable breakup because that's a lot easier to handle than a bad one, especially at dance. Other than usual relationship advice on how to handle a breakup that you already know, there are some special considerations to be made if you're a dancer. First off, once you break up with someone from dance, it can be hard to stop thinking of dancing as a "couple" activity, something that you and your former romantic partner "did.

This gives you time to recuperate mentally and think about what you want to do next. If your breakup was good or bad, take as much time as you need to feel better and consider pursuing other hobbies until you feel comfortable going back to dancing again. Sometimes it's not too long after, and other times it takes a loooooong time to get back onto the dance floor. Regardless of when you choose to return to dancing, really focus on making it "yours" and try not to think about it as "ours" if you want to be able to get over your breakup and start having positive associations with dance that aren't related to your past relationship.

It takes a lot of strength and willpower to go back to a place that hurt you once before, but stay hopeful that you will find happiness again one day Dating at dance, just like anywhere, isn't easy. However, I do not discourage you from looking for romance at dance, because it can be a very rewarding experience once you meet the right person that you really have a connection with.

I only caution you to be careful how you go about it, for reasons that I mentioned above. I have known many couples that met each other at dance and are now married, some with kids even! I do wish to remind you though that dating and finding romance can be a fun and exciting experience, it should not be the primary reason that you are going to dance. Don't force love to happen, you'll find it when you're ready.

In the meantime just get out there dance and have fun!

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Everything will come in due time Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account. The Dancing with the Stars cast mates both expressed their affection for each other with cuddly photos posted on their respective Instagram accounts in August In June , they announced big news: We are having a great time. The two tied the knot in August , and welcomed twins Haven and Hudson a little less than two years later.