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I know we will get through this my partner and I,. I'm in a similar situation. I've been with my partner for 2 and a half years, and the thing i struggle most with is the space he says he needs. We've been doing long distance for almost our whole relationship, and I struggle most with it, especially when he has moods in which he can go days without wanting to talk to me. I find it most hard to not send a message saying 'I hope you're ok xx' or 'I hope you have a good day, I love you' but I often can't keep myself from sending those messages.
I'm not sure that the messages themselves are bad, but I hate feeling the way I feel when he has read them and won't reply. For example, 2 mornings ago we were talking and he was fine, then I sent a message in reply, and he didn't read it. It came to about 8pm of the same day and I sent him a message asking if he was ok, he said no. The following day I made my organised visit to his house. The thing that bothers me most is that we couldn't sleep last night and at about midnight he had a massive group conversation with a few of his friends a group I was added to , yet he can't have a conversation with me either over message or in person??
When he's good, he's good, but when he's not feeling great, it can be really difficult. I'm unsure of how I can support him when he won't let me, or he pretends he's ok when he's talking to his friends online? It just confuses me so much. I don't know what I do wrong in the way of supporting him. Sign up below for regular emails filled with information, advice and support for you or your loved ones. Home Get support Online forums. Online forums Before you can post or reply in these forums, please complete your profile Complete your profile. Cancel The title field is required! I've recently started dating a guy and we both really like one another.
A few days ago he disclosed that he has depression and anxiety to me. He has been having a bad week and hasn't spoken to me much. We spoke a bit yesterday and he said he is worried that he is taking it out on me by needing space. I guess I just wanted to know if it's normal to not hear from someone in a low much, and also how to not take it personally. Hey Jaffa, Welcome to the forum! Hi Jaffa92 i too have recently been dating a really beautiful man who is also battling Bipolar, when we first dated he told me straight up which I admire him for that.
Good on you for reaching out for support - I know exactly how you feel. All the best x. Hi Kitty Thank you for sharing you story I found this most helpful, I've only being seeing my new partner for 6 months but he is the most amazing man I've ever met, and I like just like you oooo I love and I'll fix everything but having joining up with this group and researching I've come to know that yes my partner needs space too and he is ever so grateful for it.
I know we will get through this my partner and I, thank you for your story. Hi Jaffa92, I'm in a similar situation. Thanks for reading, Puppies. Stay in touch with us Sign up below for regular emails filled with information, advice and support for you or your loved ones. I agree to receive email communications from beyondblue you can unsubscribe from this at a later date if you wish.
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Top 9 Things to Consider When Dating Someone With Depression – Bridges to Recovery
Please select 'ok' to extend your session and prevent losing any content you are working on from being lost. I sent him a message yesterday to check in with him and ask him whether he wanted to catch up with me this weekend, and he hasn't responded. I pretty sure he's really interested in me.
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We had mutually major crushes on each other for around a year before stuff started happening a few weeks ago. He kept telling me he was so happy that things started happening. So I don't think that's the reason for the lack of contact, but still, it makes me feel ignored even though I know depression can make people shut others out and act non-rationally. I didn't ask him out sooner because a year ago I was severely depressed, and didn't think it was a good time to date.
I'm worried that he won't be able to deal with dating because of his mental health. But then again, he's had long-term relationships in the past. Should I still date him? I don't like this lack of contact, but I know it isn't necessarily something he's in control of. What am I signing up for? I really like him, but what if he's someone who won't get better ever? Welcome to Beyond Blue. Dating someone with depression can be tricky.
Are you having conversations with the real person or the one with depression. This is the start of your relationship, which means it may last forever, be over next week or something in between. At this stage I would presume his reluctance to respond has nothing to do with you personally, more likely his depression.
2. We probably won’t fit into the depression stereotype
So ask him again. Tell him you don't want to be intrusive but feel it is reasonable to have a reply. Before you do all this, think about your own situation. Remember when you were depressed. How did you feel? Did you go out on dates or was it all too hard?
Top 9 Things to Consider When Dating Someone With Depression
And thinking about this, how attracted are you to this guy? Enough to walk with him during his depression? No one else can tell you if you want to continue seeing him, it's up to you.
You have first hand knowledge of depression and understand how others feel. This may decide you to walk away because you do not want, for whatever reason, to be with a depressed person. On the other hand you may want to use your experience to help someone else, especially someone you are attracted to. I suggest, if the relationship is to continue, that you both have a heart to heart about his depression, its severity, treatment he is receiving and what help and support he would like from you.
Take it from there. I agree that dating someone with depression can be difficult, but you are familiar with illness. What if the BF had epilepsy? Would that make a difference? I was hesitant to start something with this guy sooner because of his mental health, but I decided to anyways and I'm still unsure.